Incidents in taxi stories. Life stories from a taxi driver. Taxi driver rapist - real life story

Funny stories and jokes from the life of taxi drivers

Very good driver

Moscow, distant 70s. The program “Good Evening, Moscow”, beloved by Muscovites, is on TV. The announcer reads: “We have received thank you letter from the family of S. They ask to thank a Moscow taxi worker, such and such, crew number such and such (the number was then attached to the lid of the glove compartment): “When we arrived in Moscow at the Kazansky station, due to the delay of the train we only had 40 minutes before transferring to a transit flight from the Yaroslavl station. Hearing about our problem, the taxi driver quickly loaded our things into the car and took us along the shortest route. Along the way, he showed us the Kremlin and many other sights of the capital. The road was accompanied by interesting stories about Moscow. We managed to arrive directly to the station just a few minutes before our train, and the taxi driver helped us by grabbing our things and running to carry them to our carriage. We ask you to thank such an attentive, kind, helpful employee, who left us with the best memories of your city... "

The fact is that the Kazansky and Yaroslavsky railway stations are located on the same square along with the Leningradsky railway station, which Muscovites call the Square of Three Stations. Only from Kazansky there is also access to Novoryazanskaya Street, where there was a regular taxi stand.

Bummer with the blonde

This story happened to my friend, by the way, a very attractive blonde. The girl spent the night with her friends and before going to work, she decided to stop by her apartment to change clothes (she lived nearby). It’s early morning, disgusting rainy weather, she has difficulty (there are still a few cars) catching a decent foreign car, driven by a handsome young man. The driver turned out to be very “kind” - he drove us right to the entrance, and didn’t even take any money. The girl wants to thank him somehow, and with a charming smile she says: “Can I treat you to coffee?” The man was very surprised, figured something out in his mind and joyfully said: “Of course, I won’t refuse!” To this, the friend, continuing to smile sweetly, takes out several bags of instant coffee from her purse, hands it to the astonished driver and gets out of the car. She still didn’t understand why the driver’s face looked so dull...

Don't forget about your wife

A funny story was told by a familiar taxi driver Egor: “On some long holidays, I gave a lift to a married couple. Both were drunk as cobblers! Well, I think they’ll give me a light now, but no, they quietly fell asleep in the back seat.

I brought them, the man said, wait a minute, the wife will sit, and I’ll bring you the money. I agreed what to do. But he really did bring money. I had four more calls, but people sat down one by one. And so I turn to the gas station... I look: in the rearview mirror there is something furry, incomprehensible, grumbling and reaching out to me. I almost screamed in fear! It turned out that the husband gave the money, but forgot to take his wife. So she rode with me. The funny thing is, when I brought her home, he didn’t want to open the door for her: he says my wife is at home. She howls: I’ll now see who your wife is! So don't forget each other in the taxi!"

Strange Passenger

An acquaintance once drove home in a taxi, completely drunk! Night. Dark. He drives up to his home, and then a thought crept into his head: “Shouldn’t he just leave without paying? The house is big, he ran into the entrance - and look for fistulas!” Well, he rushed out of the car as soon as they stopped. First, he flew headfirst into a lamppost, then tripped over the curb and fell onto a bench. While I was getting up, I tore my pants on a nail sticking out of the bench. For about three minutes I tried to open the combination lock. All this time, the taxi driver looked at the client with stunned eyes from the car and did not take any active action. "He's shocked!" - he thought. Everything turned out to be simpler - when the friend finally got into the entrance, he remembered that he had paid the driver when he got into the car.

Just like in the advertisement

I was in a taxi. The taxi driver said after another bump:

Oh, these roads!

I was tempted to answer him:

Oh, I understand you so well!

How can you understand me, you don’t even have a car?

Well, just yesterday I had a car...

Metallic blue

My friend’s mother, a rather elderly woman, had never used a taxi in her life, but it turned out that she had to. So, she dials a taxi number and orders a car, the operator says that he will call back. The waiting time passes, and the operator reports that the car has already arrived, the car number is such and such, the color is blue metallic. She (friend's mother) comes out, sees the car, walks around it three times, but never gets in. The driver realizes that this is his client, opens the door and asks: “Did you call a taxi?”

The woman asks in response: “So you are the blue Vitalik?”

The man, blushing, says: “Sit down,” and takes her to her destination.

How to have fun on a minibus (guide)

Enter the minibus with a black patch over your eye. Instead of money, place a glass eye in the driver's palm. To say that there is nothing more to pay with. Introduce yourself as Billy Bones.

Sitting down in the front seat, carefully examine the radio, press a couple of buttons on it, pick up the phone, dial a number, say into the phone: “Hello, boss! It’s the same garbage here with the radio! Yes, we’ll take action!” Get off at the next stop.

When handing over money to the driver, each time give him two fists and ask: “Guess which one?”

While in the cabin, look closely at one of the passengers. When he notices this, call the phone and say into the phone: “Hello, boss! I found him!”

Play a pre-recorded female voice louder on your phone: “Caller Identification program has been activated.” Squinting slyly, glance at the passengers.

Watch porn on your phone with loud sound. At the same time, make notes in a notebook, periodically chewing on a pen, think and look at the ceiling.

Jumping up from your seat, look out of different windows. Ask passengers what kind of city this is. Having received the answer, calm down and say: “Well, thank God! Not far left!”

Once in the front seat, take out the steering wheel on the suction cup and attach it to the front panel. Having told the driver: “I love the Japanese right-hand drive!”, start steering. When turning, turn the steering wheel sharply, either sharply to the right or sharply to the left. At the same time, you can periodically shout out: “Wow! You can keep her in a rut!”

Photo: official website

We are sure that each of our readers will have their own funny story that happened in a taxi. A journalist from the ZagraNitsa portal interviewed three taxi drivers and collected funny cases related to foreigners in Moscow

As a rule, such cases occur abroad, and if the taxi driver and the tourist do not yet understand each other, or understand each other with difficulty, the percentage of getting into an awkward situation increases exponentially. But, fortunately, there is a way out of any situation. The main thing is to show resourcefulness, which taxi drivers are not short of. Stories of taxi drivers in our material.

Evgeniy has been working at City Taxi for 6 years, with a total experience of 35 years.

The incident happened a week ago. I met the client, we got into the car and headed off. The destination was the hotel "" on Tverskaya. We have already entered the city, driving along the Leningradskoye Highway. And then the client asks me to stop, supposedly we have already arrived. At first I didn’t understand what was going on - it was still a long way to the hotel. Then it turned out that the client had a booklet with him, which contained a photo of the hotel. He just saw a similar building. I explained to him that this is not the right place and we are moving on. You should have seen his face: he was very scared, probably decided that it was a kidnapping or something similar. So, silently squeezing himself into a chair, he sat the whole way. But when we got to the hotel, his joy knew no bounds.

Alexey, has been working at City Taxi for 2 years, with a total experience of 12 years.

I once met the Germans at Vnukovo airport. I had a sign with their names, I knew the number of the gate from which they were supposed to leave, the time of arrival - a standard situation. But there were still no clients. I waited for some time, then called our control room, and it turned out that the tourists left through a different gate. It was problematic to call them because I don’t know German. I had to walk around the airport with a sign, approach other foreigners in the hope that they would be my clients. Some were perplexed, others for some reason were very scared. Apparently, they thought that I wanted something from them. For some reason, the clients decided not to stand in one place and also went looking for me, so we probably missed them more than once. After about forty minutes of wandering around the airport, we finally found ourselves safely.

There was another funny incident. I was picking up a tourist from China from a hotel in the center of Moscow and encountered a language barrier. She spoke English very poorly: she didn’t understand what I told her. But I knew the destination and delivered her there safely. The problems started when she tried to pay me with a five thousand note. I didn’t have change, and I said so. The client didn't understand me. I typed this phrase in English on the phone and showed it to her - she didn’t understand. I had to use Google translator from Russian to Chinese. Fortunately, it helped.

Mark, has been working at City Taxi for 3 years, total experience - 5 years

I have been working as a driver for five years, of course, I also had to drive foreigners. The situation with English is like this: I can hear what the British and Americans say quite well, but if a non-native speaker speaks to me in English, problems begin. There was a case when I arrived at the airport to order, and the flight my client was flying on arrived much earlier. As it turned out later, he mixed up the arrival time.

It was not interesting for him to stand in one place for so long, and he went for a walk around the airport. So the client was no longer at the agreed meeting place. We got on the phone, but a problem arose: we understood each other’s English very poorly. Still, we managed to meet, although it was very difficult to explain where I was waiting for him.

It didn't end there. The client needed to change money, but the currency exchange office at the airport was closed for a break. A man immediately approached us and offered to exchange currency, and my foreigner was already ready to do so. I managed to dissuade him, and the “money changer” immediately disappeared, casting a withering glance at me. I told the client that we could find an exchange office in the city. Did not work out. The Sberbank branch in Nagatino, where I took him, was also closed. I had to go to the center.

Taxi stories.

Hi all! I think that all of you girls often use taxi services. Have you ever had any interesting, funny, or terrible situations with taxi drivers? If you haven’t been with taxi drivers, then you can tell us about the metro, or buses, or even planes.

I often take a taxi. Taxi drivers are normal, but sometimes they are not adequate at all. One day, one of them started complaining that his fiancée was cheating on him with everyone, but that wasn’t the point. The real point was that she was raped by her stepfather, and she was traumatized, so it was not her fault. I was shocked by such revelations. He also asked me not to get out of the car and listen to the end.

Once again I got into a taxi, and the guy was kind of strange. And the thought flashed through my mind that he was probably a sectarian - I’m lucky with sectarians. Well, a few minutes later he turned on the church howls and asked if I wanted him to tell me about God. I grinned and said that I thought that he would want to tell me about God. Next, he tried to tease me with the fact that I probably hadn’t read the Bible, and that wearing pants was a sin. I answered him that yes, I am aware of all this, I told him about God, and at the end I added, like, don’t judge, and you won’t be judged. It was funny that he was surprised that I knew everything perfectly well and that there was no way to treat me. Moral - don't judge people by their appearance and make hasty conclusions. I wrote it so briefly - I don’t like a lot of letters.

My husband drives taxis in the evenings, come on, tell me interesting stories about taxi drivers.

I took a taxi about 10 years ago. Why drive a damaged car with a driver from neighboring countries, if you can get into your super cool car and drive and enjoy it?

Classic. They quoted one price when calling a taxi, but upon arrival it changed dramatically. In Egypt. But when my fiancé and I bombed ourselves 3 years ago, there were always great stories there.

I've taken a taxi three times in my life, no incidents.

It’s annoying to explain to taxi drivers in Asia where I need to go. As a rule, they don’t speak English, and they don’t understand my memorized phrases in Chinese or Japanese either, so I always have to carry a piece of paper with my address. In principle, nothing particularly interesting happened, it happened, of course, that I poured out my soul to the taxi drivers, and then they poured out my soul to me, but this is the norm.

There are business class taxis for particularly picky clients, with good cars and neat-looking drivers

I was once driving a taxi, and the driver farted so much that my mascara ran. All.
Then I re-drew the face.

In the Stambul. I was driving home after work, I was tired, I couldn’t even walk, I got into the first car. We set off, which means the driver is turning on the music loudly, I ask him to turn it down a little. He says, no, I threatened him that I would go out and change the taxi, he immediately said “wait, wait, wait, I have something else for you.” And.. Turns on the discus ball in the car! Discus thrower, Karl! I drove off, having fun, and didn’t blather any more.

There was one time when they were rude. Like, you’re about to break the door, it didn’t open. It was not an accident, but a nightmare when I accidentally got into the wrong taxi.
I thought I wouldn’t come back alive.

Today again, Istanbul again, I got into the car, chewed a bun, and offered the driver a piece. He didn’t take it, but on the way he bought some tea for me in the car. Of course, I could have added something, but I trusted it, and everything was fine!

I always have fun with taxi drivers; sometimes they’ll ask me out on a date, sometimes they’ll tell me about their lives. They talked to one so animatedly about traffic rules that he didn’t notice how he drove through a red light and was stopped by the police. And one day I came across a very friendly elderly man - a taxi driver. He and I got to talking on the road. He gave his phone to watch a video where he reads his poems at the Lenin monument, for which he was given a bonus - 10 thousand 800 rubles. Then he announced that he was a good singer and for the rest of the way we sang the black raven.

One taxi driver told how he took his woman to the forest to teach him a lesson, and in general, in 15 minutes he managed to tell about all the women in his life, he was on drugs.

I argue with taxi drivers very often. Sometimes it almost comes to fights. In general, sometimes you come across such insolent drivers! Otherwise, the scoreboard is meaner, and they won’t pester you with conversations

Nothing special. A taxi driver of Caucasian nationality pulled up and offered a free ride in exchange for my phone number.

The most adequate taxi drivers, by the way, are men slightly over 40 years old and drive Toyotas.

Oh, I take a taxi almost every day, but there was an incident on a trolleybus! I’m driving home, so I approach the bus stop, stare at my phone, read my favorite forum, and then I notice that a seemingly diligent man is standing at the exit and waving his pussy. It was bitterly cold outside, but he simply waved again, tucked it back into his pants, zipped up his fly, and left. A curtain.

My friend and I had sex in a taxi. The driver almost flew off the road into a ditch. I'm a girl.

Once, due to ignorance of the language, they took me far, trying to take more money, and we still didn’t get a ride to work. I was screaming in wild rage and threw him as much money as the trip would actually cost. And at this time (it was near the tourist palace) another Turk opened the door for me and said “welcome to paradise”, I almost let his guts through this door.

Oh, just recently there was a woman taxi driver who looked like Yanka Adams and listened to criminal chanson.

Everywhere I find adventures for my ass. Once I came across the same taxi driver three times in a row; He started grabbing my hands and offering a bet: if he comes for me again, we’ll sleep together. I don't order a taxi from this service anymore.

Oh, just like that, I also left the entrance and got into the guy’s car, thinking that this was my taxi. He, of course, was stunned, and then I also felt awkward, because at his perplexed look I said, “what are we standing for, let’s go,” in the end they found out everything, and he still took me where I needed to go.

Today I was driving with a Georgian taxi driver, about 48 years old, and we sang songs and laughed.

I remember falling out of a club in my distant youth, at 6 in the morning the “wet asphalt” nine stops, there is a fierce trance sitting there, in clothes in the style of the movie “Pretty Woman”, fishnet stockings, a white wig, and so on. Probably two meters tall. But the phrase that killed me more was: “My pussies, where are you going?” - with an inimitable pronunciation. I sobered up.

I constantly take a taxi, many taxi drivers tried to pour out their souls to me more than once, sometimes I argued with taxi drivers because of the music. In general, in a taxi, I usually abstract myself from everything around me, otherwise I often come across chatterboxes and not everyone immediately understands that I’m not in the mood for conversations, but it seems like there’s nothing special. Although once a grandfather of about 60 suggested that if I let him hold my knee, I wouldn’t have to pay. I looked at him so much that he felt cramped in the car.

It was on the minibus. One day, my friend and I got very drunk and in the morning we took a minibus home. We sat forward to the driver, I sat closer to him. In short, I began to be completely knocked out, and I landed my head on his shoulder five times. It was so embarrassing afterwards.

And I noticed that almost all taxi drivers have Renault Logan, Deo Matiz, or Lada.

Once, on a business trip to Ivanovo, a priest, a good man, took me. He earns as much as he can, he wants to build his own parish, that’s why he works as a taxi driver. We had a heartfelt talk, good guy. But the coolest taxi drivers usually take you from the airport. There was a taxi driver in Moscow who offered to make money with electronic money, spent about 40 minutes trying to persuade me to come to a seminar on nanomoney and blah blah, promising that I would get rich. Another said that in the 90s he worked as a bartender, and he was included in the Guinness Book of Records for making the largest cocktail and also said that he found a suitcase with money in the subway.

Well, one day I vomited on the bus.

In general, with the emergence of such services as get-taxi, commander, and so on, it has become easier. If something is wrong, I immediately call the dispatcher and complain.

You also talk to taxi drivers! I'd rather put headphones in my ears so I don't have to listen to this bullshit.

Taxi drivers always talk to me about their lives, complain about something, pour out their souls, apparently they feel that I am a psychologist by training. And once a taxi driver really scared me. I get into the car, close the door, and he says to me: “Do you want to ride for free?” I went nuts. I sit and think, maybe I should call the police, or run away. And then it dawned on him how it sounded. He started laughing and said: “The dispatcher made a mistake with the address, I’ve been looking for you here for about 20 minutes.” Oh, how I was relieved then!

On the train, in a compartment, there were three of us: below me and a man about 50 years old, above a guy about 20 years old. The man went straight to the restaurant. We went to bed. I hear a man come back at night, I tell him, open the door a crack, otherwise it will be stuffy. He agrees, like, now I’ll change clothes and leave the door ajar. A couple of minutes have passed, he tries to open the door slightly and it doesn’t work. He screams in fear that the conductor has closed us. I got up to help, the door opened slightly, light came into the compartment, I saw this freak sitting without panties.

I stood at the bus stop, waiting for the last bus. Besides me, there were two more people who needed to go to the same area, but there was no bus. I decided to call a taxi, those two also didn’t know what to do, she offered to go with me, they got there well, then they scraped together the taxi driver’s fare, the guy turned out to be a good guy, he took all three of them home, we had a fun ride.

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A story happened to me the other day. Not quite like a taxi, but still interesting. I went to visit late in the evening. I'm standing at the bus stop, waiting for the bus. An SUV pulls up and stops in front of me. The driver unbuttons his pants and invites me into the car. I turned away, I thought he would leave. Naive! I’m standing there, it’s not leaving, I turn my head, and there the work is in full swing. Well, I moved away from the car, closer to the people. Still worth it. Here's my route. I sit down, leave, exhale. I’m driving, I turn my head, and he’s driving near my window without stopping his satisfaction. I start to drive him and give him pleasure with all sorts of gestures, in the end I show him, will he give me money? Having received a positive answer, I indicate that I am getting off at the next stop. He is on the gas to meet me, and I am a dynamo.

Once I got into a taxi, I roared, we talked for a long time. Let's go for a little drive. We drove under some bridge who knows where, and the taxi driver started smoking weed through a bottle. I smoked and we chatted again. Then we drove closer to my house, and he took out a hairdryer, started making paths, and the parish came normally like that. We rode with him for 3 hours. Didn't take the money. In general, there are many stories with taxi drivers. I take a taxi every day.

The sectarian taxi driver sold me his books while we were driving!

The funniest incidents with taxi drivers were when I, in my youth, felt sick while walking after going to clubs.

I confess, the same thing happened once. Vomited like a fountain after the club in Tansi. It’s terribly embarrassing, but what should I do?

One day my grandmother and I were riding in a taxi through a store. I was about 15 years old.
Grandma went to the store, and I sat with the driver. And he says, “Now I’ll show you something.” I took out a box of leg shaving gel, and while my grandmother was away, I shaved my entire household!

An acquaintance told me a terrible story: at night in the cold, God knows how long he waited for a taxi, finally an impressive guy arrived: under fifty dollars, a goatee, an earring in his ear, rings on his fingers. In general, the guy looked at him predatorily and carefully all the way. The acquaintance was not completely sober, and decided that he was worried that he might vomit in the salon. Not so. As they began to approach the entrance, the taxi driver became more active - his hand crawled to his fly. The friend went nuts, fidgeted, let’s count out the money, and the guy smiled at him and stroked his fly. According to a friend, everything seemed to work out with standard payment, but for some reason he refused to call the company and complain.

Okay, when you’re young, it happens to everyone that you feel sick in the car after a club, this New Year’s Eve I asked to stop a taxi 3 times on the way home.

When I was young, I worked as a flight attendant (in common parlance, a flight attendant) and then we had a flight to Krasnoyarsk. I was responsible for the blankets and pillows. We took off, 15 minutes passed after takeoff, and I went to distribute them. They were kept in bags in our oxygen compartment. I open the door and there is a bunch of shit on bags. I go tell the senior flight attendant about this, he doesn’t believe me, and we go look at the shit together. It was someone who, within 15 minutes of takeoff, was able to climb there (and the door to these bags is next to the doors to the toilet) and, having climbed onto them in the “eagle” position, crap the entire takeoff. Here's a passenger! Upon arrival, the technical service to whom I handed over these blankets looked at me as if I had done the dirty, so as not to carry them away.

I have a lot of such stories. Once I was driving with a crazy driver. He was having a dialogue with himself. Like talking on the phone. And he was still indignant from time to time. I thought he was in the earphone, but when I listened to this nonsense, I immediately asked him to stop. But the best part was that it was a training machine, and there were other functioning pedals under my feet. They brought the man. Not funny, but scary.

I worked as a guide for 2 seasons, there are a lot of different stories, some funny and some not so funny. What I remember most was when passengers were robbed at the station because they didn’t close the compartment, and they blamed me, like, I gave the tip. And there was also a passenger who kept throwing wedges at me for half the flight, I was freezing, and then he came and started complaining that his fiancée kicked me out.

I often take a taxi, practically all the time. But somehow there weren’t any special cases. I always sit in the back and control the process.

One day on May 8th there was a race on Lenin Avenue in honor of the holiday, and in this area I had to pick up a camera from the workshop, I got some work done, but I was also late for practice, and I had to go to the other end of the city for about 30 minutes, I decided to call a taxi and so that you can pay without cash. While I was talking, I heard a man in the background and shouted that taxis couldn’t come here. He called his friend, a taxi driver, he snuck through the yards, took me home, we exchanged phone numbers and started talking. Now this is my husband!

5 years ago, my friend and I were waiting in the morning after the club for the metro to open. A foreign car stops and offers a ride - the amount is not large, like, along the way. Moreover, I had previously met this guy alone in a company. He recognized me and, in a friendly manner, offered me a ride home for a small extra fee. At first we drove normally, then we turned into a back street and got out of the car and began to climb into the back seats. I started yelling, and there was just a student dormitory there - and two guys and a girl, apparently they were walking by, came up to the car to find out what had happened. And they walked me to the metro. Tough, in short!

We were taking a taxi, and the taxi driver was smoking weed and offering it to us.

Whoa. And I thought that they were stopping just to bomb, but that’s what it turns out. In general, I was surprised that the guy was young, even attractive and quite presentable. And his arm span was not small, is that what people are missing?

Apparently, he likes the process of violence itself. The guy who gave me a lift, firstly, we still knew each other and through mutual friends I could find out his address and last name. Secondly, with a new BMW, if I had the money, I could pick up a prostitute. But, apparently, what they want is physical and moral violence - in general, the head is in disarray.

Usually taxi drivers start asking about nationality, then about gender. One of them actually killed someone recently, he said, “You’re 16 years old, my son is 19 years old, would you like me to introduce you?” I said: “Uncle, I’m 23,” he was stunned.

I had a similar story. It’s also a nice big car, and I was about 17 years old, and I was walking the dog. I was walking along the sidewalk, and two men cut me off in this car. I was ready to run as if I were on my heels. Then it turned out that these two were running a store with us. I really regret that I was young and didn’t write a statement. And although, why should she, our legislation is not great.

It was in China. The driver tried to cheat with money, they have a meter in the taxi, and in China there is such a trick that the driver can press a button and the money rolls in faster, they do this with foreigners. Like, we're idiots and everything's fine. We were traveling with friends, I know Shanghai perfectly and I know how much it costs to get there and which way. At first he started driving by another route, he ignored all requests to go along the short road known to me, then the money quickly began to accumulate, and we didn’t even drive half the road. As a result, we shouted at him, the taxi driver stopped the car and we got out without paying him, but for what the hell? He didn’t deliver, and the amount was huge, in the end he grabbed my friend, started pushing her into the car, pushing her, and so on, we got into a fight with him, called the police, spent the whole night in the police, clarified everything. In the end, even the beating was removed, because the driver grabbed his girlfriend’s hand until she bruised, he was deprived of his license, and moral damages were also attributed. When we left the station, I had never heard such swearing in Chinese.

On this page we publish different stories from life, one way or another connected with taxis. Our clients and drivers send them to us. If you have your own story, send it to us by email - we will be happy to publish it.

Such different meetings

On the Internet I often see negativity towards employees. And I would like to tell you about a trip full of positive things, and one that subsequently radically changed my life.

I had to pick up my car from the service center and then go around with an inspection. outlets companies. The weather is unpleasant, slush, rain mixed with snow. Decided .

God dandelion

A friend who works in a taxi told me.
I was riding into the night and an order came in. I drove up to a residential area, stood there, waiting for a client.
Granny, “God’s dandelion,” comes out of the entrance. So small and neat. In a beret. She sits on the edge of the seat and asks to take her... to the cemetery. At ten o'clock in the evening.

Warriors

Ordinary day, ordinary order. True, it’s not cheap, because you need to go somewhere in the region. Well, why not, in principle? I'm driving. The music is playing, the girl in a polite voice in the navigator says where to turn. There are fewer and fewer cars, more and more trees and potholes on the road.

Colleagues

I work as a system administrator, and often earn extra money by repairing computers privately. I was returning home from a client; it was already quite late. I called a taxi. The car arrived, we loaded up, and off we went.
I’m sitting, relaxing, and suddenly the phone rings. There's a friend on the line with a question.

Fight against corruption

I came to the call. Large office center with extremely inconvenient parking. I drive up to pick up a client, there are no cars, but there is only one empty space ahead. And it is located in such a way that if I stand on it, I will not leave until a car drives away, which, by the law of meanness, will probably immediately park behind me. You can jump on curbs, of course, but it’s not an option. Not an option at all.

Dad

I recently had an interesting case. I came to the call. A young guy comes down, approaches, and, clearly embarrassed, turns to me.

Hello. It was I who called you... Here’s the thing... In general, my dad got drunk, my mother took my sister and went to my aunt. She said until he stops drinking, he won’t come back. And I have it like this... In general, until you encode it, it doesn’t stop. I tried to persuade him for two days, but I barely succeeded. But no one undertakes to carry it. Please take it! Beg! I’ll pay double, and if something gets dirty there or something else, I’ll compensate for everything! Please!

Fateful taxi.

A very beautiful, but incredibly harmful young lady lives in my house. We often ran into her at the entrance, she would turn away so demonstratively, her nose would turn up, her lips would pout. Queen, in general! I don’t know why she didn’t like me so much. There seemed to be no reason and no reason given. But that's not the point.

Friends invited me to a wedding. Yes, not just a guest, but a witness to the groom. At first I refused, but the bride persuaded me. “I found such a young lady as your witness,” he says, “you’ll rock it!” He spat, he realized that they wouldn’t lag behind - he agreed.

Mighty Clients

Worked in Taxi. This happened just during the crisis of 98. Money was tight, and he often slept in his car while working around the clock. At night the best orders are available, and there is practically no traffic around the city. And it takes less gasoline, less time, and the same money.
Two o'clock in the morning. I'm sitting behind the wheel, nodding. The walkie-talkie comes to life. There is an order!

A Nightmare on Elm Street

I came to the call, the dispatcher warned that there would be luggage. Well, I drove up to the house, I stood there, waiting.
A man comes out of the entrance, carrying a large black plastic bag on his shoulder. I open the trunk and wonder what I'm carrying. The answer leaves me stunned for a second:
- Dead body.

Cheerful family

I worked the night, it’s five in the morning, I’m about to go home to sleep. And suddenly - order. Also on the way home. Well, why not take it, I think?
I arrive at the address, and a very rumpled man, but positively glowing with joy, comes out of the entrance. It is clear that he spent a stormy and full of impressions night. He gets into the car, starts a conversation, and tries in every possible way to shift it to an amorous topic. I want to brag! I notice a ring on the man’s ring finger. I'm silent. After all, what do I care?

Resourceful client

I often drive regular customer. A young guy, his business is some kind of retail. Several points around the city. The guy is talkative, cheerful, cultured. Often for the whole day Taxi I hired them, drove around to my points, and delivered goods. Why not transport such a client? He called me again. I just finished the order, so I went to get it.

Prodigal Client

I was getting ready to go home from my shift. One more order, I think - and it’s ok. I did a good job that day. The radio just comes to life. There is a place near me. Well, great.
I roll up to the bar. Three drunk men are standing. The ones that drink only become more harmless. Normal audience, they just like to talk about their lives. I'm approaching, they're loaded, we're going.

Well, a little pepper.

Comedy club. How taxi drivers swear.

He was a taxi driver in the worst sense of the word. Robberying a drunk, ripping off three skins from a visitor, defrauding a lonely woman was a matter of course for him, but he still knew how to deceive a respectable passenger. The main thing is to earn money, because money has no smell. And they often had to fight for them. Literally and figuratively. You can't do without this in a taxi. Time passed as usual, and he calmly watched how his soul hardened, how he became indifferent to people, to himself, to life. There was no family. Friends too. A few relatives lived in other cities. He didn't get along well with people. He had long ago come to the conclusion that life was not a success, and only work distracted him from sad thoughts, and the tough pre-trip medical control didn't let me sleep. This is how I lived. It seems that he lived...

One late evening I stopped at the Volkovsky cemetery to count the money I had earned for the day. Out of the corner of my eye I watched a young woman on the opposite side of the road unsuccessfully trying to catch a car. The place was remote, although close to the city center. Rare cars stopped, but they didn’t want to take it. He was about to leave when he saw that she was heading towards him. He lowered the window and asked where to go. She gave the address.
He whistled: “Far! And how much do you pay?
All clear. For that kind of money no one will be lucky. Seeing the pot-bellied bag in her hands, he mockingly asked:
“What do you have there? Gold, diamonds?
“Yes, these are my son’s clothes. They put me in the hospital."
The gloomy building of the children's city hospital, visible nearby, was familiar to him. He was brought here in early childhood when he fell ill with hepatitis. He was a home child and was very bored without his mother. Sometimes at night, when everyone was falling asleep, he got up and, going to the window, looked down at the street for a long time, hoping to see his mother. She, of course, was not there, but he continued to stand until it became cold. Then he climbed under the blanket and, covering his head, cried quietly. For the first time he felt abandoned and alone. He is still alone, but he has forgotten how to cry.
Having pushed away the uninvited memories, he threw out the usual “Refuse!” and without listening to her persuasion, he left. He didn’t have time to drive far when in the rearview mirror he saw two men appearing from nowhere next to the girl. One snatched the bag, and the second, covering her mouth, dragged her into the nearest bushes. Having stopped the car so that it was not visible to the attackers, he pulled out the tire iron and quickly walked back. When he heard the sounds of a struggle and muffled cries for help, he pretended to be drunk and, purring something under his breath, turned into the bushes, supposedly to relieve himself. Feeling sneaking steps from behind, he waited the necessary time, and turning around sharply, hit the one approaching with a crowbar. It turned out well. The attacker silently sank to the ground and, falling to his side, remained lying motionless. He jumped up to the second one, who was raping the girl, and from the bottom of his heart he stretched the montage across his back. He howled and tried to get up, but another blow, this time a kick to the groin, made him instantly curl up in pain and fall silent. Well, he grabbed the girl by the hand and jerked her to her feet. With the words “Run! Faster!” dragged her along with him. He was not going to wait for the police to arrive. You can also get a prison term for exceeding the permissible self-defense limit. Moreover, the one he hit first showed no signs of life. Unexpectedly, the girl pulled her hand away and returned to the rapist. She kicked him several times and, only after that, ran back, taking at the same time her bag, which was lying nearby.

When they jumped into the car, he rushed off, so that there was a smell of burning rubber, but he did not turn on the side lights so that random passers-by would not be able to see and remember the car number. After driving a couple of blocks and seeing that everything was quiet and there was no pursuit, I calmed down. Now you can smoke! The girl sat silently, placing her bag on her knees so that her torn dress and bruises on her legs were not visible, and seemed indifferent. But he understood that she was stressed. He stopped the car and took out a bottle of vodka that he bought for the weekend, poured her some and made her drink it. She coughed from the alcohol taking her breath away. Tears came to her eyes and they could no longer be stopped. Let him cry! You look and feel better. He put the car in gear and drove on in silence, giving her the opportunity to cry and come to her senses. Gradually she calmed down and only the trembling fingers of her hands, when she took a drag from a cigarette, betrayed her inner tension.

"Thank you! Saved me from these freaks! You are a real man! I can rely on you...
She still said something laudatory about him, but he no longer listened.
"Stupid! Maybe she can rely on me! Of course!” - evil thoughts completely ruined the already bad mood, - “And why do I need this rigmarole..?”

The first person he betrayed in his life was God. They were taken as a class on an excursion to the Hermitage. Look at the pictures. The martyr's face of Christ, the blood and those terrible nails with which he was nailed to the cross, struck the boy's imagination. At home, his grandmother told him everything she knew about God and he believed in his existence. Immediately and unconditionally. But in the yard, when he shared his discovery with his peers, he was laughed at. It turns out there is no God! And everything was created by Nature! He did not want to become an object of ridicule and he easily renounced the God who had just been revealed and loved by him. So he became an atheist. To be like everyone else! But actually out of fear of becoming an outcast. Moreover, there was no need to fear God. He is merciful and has forgiven the betrayal. Like him best friend, whom he betrayed in a fight, losing heart and running away shamefully. His relatives also forgave him when he could not come to his father’s funeral. A respectful reason- protection of the diploma. But he soon betrayed his profession as an engineer, turning to work as a taxi driver. Many forgave him, and only his beloved woman, his first and only wife, did not forgive his adultery. She took her little son and disappeared from his life forever, leaving unknown where. The unexpected freedom that a married man dreams of at least once in his life did not bring joy. Attempts to save the family were in vain. Loneliness and melancholy settled in his house for a long time.

Soon we reached the place. She began frantically rummaging through her bag in search of her wallet.
“You don’t need money,” he said dryly.
“Then maybe you should get up and have some tea?” she suggested hesitantly.

Experiencing danger heightens feelings. The sex was rough and short. Then they lay in bed and she told him about herself. He knew how to listen, and when she, having spilled everything out, fell silent, he unexpectedly asked: “Why do you have no toys at all? Children love to play."
“Who should he play with? I’m at work all the time... So you stay with us and buy toys. He'll play enough!" She giggled sheepishly.

Her proposal excited him. And what? Well, at least some meaning will appear in his life. She was a competent woman and he liked her. Again, you can go to the bathhouse with the boy. And he will teach him to play football. He has the first men's football category. After all, I played for the men for the city championship. You can get a dog. Since childhood he dreamed of a dog...

He began to quickly get dressed. She did not understand him and said guiltily and reconcilingly: “Yes, I was joking! Where are you going? It’s still night.”
On the threshold, he hurriedly said: “I’ll be there soon! Do you like surprises? Wait!”
He bought a whole bunch of gifts at a nearby department store. Toys for the boy and all sorts of things for her too. He took whatever came to hand and attracted attention. “We’ll figure it out later!” he said, throwing another purchase into the basket, and smiled happily.
The driver of the Kamaz, a young guy, had not slept for almost a day and was in a hurry to get home, so he mistook the green arrow for a traffic light permitting signal, especially since the red input signal was not working. He practically did not brake when he collided with the Volga. The taxi driver was taken away by ambulance in serious condition, and he was taken for medical examination. Children's toys and other belongings from the wrecked car were stolen by cops and workers repairing the road that early morning.
She waited for him all day, and in the evening she called her friend and asked her to come. They got drunk and came to the conclusion that there were no more real men. Died out. Like mammoths.
___________________________________________________________________________

Hello?
Hello...I gave you a lift that night...remember?
Ahhh...You're good at surprises...
Sorry... it just happened... Has your son recovered?
Has long been.
Maybe we can go somewhere? I'm down here at the entrance...taxi, red Ford

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